Updated: Oct 29, 2021
Committing to marriage is a monumental step that you must be ready to take before getting down on one knee.
We’re talking about promising your partner to stand by her side for the rest of eternity. In sickness and in health, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer. You’re making a vow to stay faithful to the person you love. There’s nothing more beautiful than that sacred moment.
But, how do you know if you’re truly ready?
Is there a checklist of success criteria you have to hit before popping the question?
Or is it as simple as feeling ready?
This week’s post dives into understanding whether you’re truly ready to propose.
Already sure you’re going to pop the question? Check out our latest blog post ‘10 Ways to Propose on a Budget’ for ultra romantic ways to propose and keep the wallet healthy at the same time.
Have you discussed marriage together?
First thing’s first: are you both at a stage in your relationship where marriage feels to be the next natural step? Do you discuss it?
If not, try bringing it up in conversation. See how it feels.
It’s important that you’re on mutual ground. Marriage should mean similar concepts to the pair of you, and if not, explore the reasons for this.
Is her standing point understandable? Is it something you can empathize with?
Discussing marriage is a fantastic way to test the waters. Just like in a hotel, dipping your big toe into the pool will help you decide whether you’re happy to go for a swim.
Your partner supports your dream and ambitions
Committing to a marriage means building a future together. It means so much more than acceptance. It also requires a humongous amount of support on either side.
Does your partner know what you want to do in life? Does she support your dream?
This is going to be so crucial to live a long, happy life together.
And, of course, it works both ways.
Are you fully supportive of your partner’s career direction? Have you discussed the future in terms of work? Is she a career girl? Or are her thoughts elsewhere?
It doesn’t necessarily matter what she chooses to do, as long as you are able to support her on this journey.
Complete support and being each other’s biggest cheerleaders is vital for a happy marriage. So, make sure the vision of your future aligns well together.
Have you met each other’s family?
Meeting the family is a big milestone in a relationship. We’d always recommend that you ask her father for permission to propose.
Though it’s old school, if nothing else, you’ll definitely gain his respect.
When embarking on a life-long journey of true love, having dad’s respect will go a long way.
She’ll need to have met your family, too.
While it’s not essential, it’s important to know about her upbringing, her family dynamic and how you will both fit into each other’s lives as a partner.
Of course, it’s highly dependent on how close you both are with your families. If she’s mega-family-orientated, then it will matter massively to her. If, however, she’s distant with her family, it may not be a dealbreaker.
Nonetheless, it’s important that you’re able to sit comfortably in the family’s presence. If it feels awkward and forced, it’s unlikely to improve just because you got married.
Do you miss each other when you’re not together?
Look, we’ll level with you: it’s totally normal to be excited about having the house to yourself for a night or two. You’re able to watch all the shows you wanted, have a pamper session or have a few beers with the boys.
But, if you were apart for longer than, let’s say 5 days, would you miss each other?
Wanting to be in each other’s presence for the vast majority of the time is a healthy sign that the time for a proposal is near.
As a married couple, you’ll be spending 99% of your time together, so it’s important to know that you genuinely want to be in each other’s space.
Have you been on vacation together?
Whether you’re hopping on a plane or taking a road trip, going on vacation together offers a glimpse of what it’ll be like to live together.
If you don’t already cohabit, going on a trip shows you how your significant other functions.
Of course, you’re not going to have hotel staff and room service when you eventually move in together, but you’ll still learn heaps.
If you struggled to be in the same hotel room for a few days, perhaps it’s worth having a conversation about why.
Do you already live together?
The concept of getting married before moving in together is outdated. Hardly anyone follows this tradition anymore.
Getting married is so much more than a piece of paper. It’s a commitment that lasts a lifetime. It’s promising each other that you’ll be together forever. Which, of course, includes living together.
Moving in with each other shines the light on every area of your partner, and does exactly the same for her. Do you function together?
Expect a few squabbles - that’s totally normal. But, if you’re arguing every day for an extended period of time, that needs to be addressed.
Are you completely and utterly in love?
We’ve saved the most important question for last. There’s a lot of pressure in our modern day society to get married at a certain age and settle down.
That pressure, unfortunately, goes to people’s heads.
Are you in love with each other? Do you see each other’s flaws and love them all the more for them?
A marriage should be built on a solid foundation of total adoration for your partner.
If that foundation is completely secure, you can clearly envision your future together and you feel ready to propose, then stop waiting.
There’s never a ‘right time’. As you’ll come to learn, having children, getting married, moving house - all of these momentous life changes never have a ‘right time’.
If it feels right, then now’s the time.
Go and seize your opportunity and start your lives together.
Don’t know where to start? Browse through our engagement ring collection here.
Still struggling to find the perfect ring? Download our Ultimate Guide to Choosing the Perfect Engagement Ring here.